The Adventures of PadFoots & ToeBeans - Official Household Record #001
Excellent choice! ;)
Petsmart: The Day I Acquired My Human
Book One: Petsmart – The Day I Acquired My HumanMy name is Marlowe.I wasn't looking for a family that day.Not exactly.I was simply sitting in my kitten room at the pet store, conducting very important observations.Some humans walked by too fast.Some poked the glass.Some squealed.Some said things like,"Awwwww!"None of them looked particularly qualified.Then...She arrived.Not the big human.The little human.Tiny.Curly-haired.About three feet tall.Powered entirely by excitement.She burst through the rescue room door like a miniature tornado."Ohhhhhhhh KITTYYYYYYYY!"Every kitten in the room scattered.One disappeared behind the litter box.Two climbed the tallest cat tree.Another somehow vanished into a hammock.Amateurs.I watched the little whirlwind carefully.She wasn't dangerous.She was just...loud.Very.Very.Loud.The big human looked embarrassed."I'm so sorry," she whispered to the rescue volunteer.The volunteer laughed."It happens."Apparently this wasn't even the loudest toddler they'd seen.Impressive.The little human sat down in the middle of the floor.Well...She didn't exactly sit.She bounced.Then wiggled.Then talked to every kitten whether they wanted to listen or not.Nobody volunteered.I sighed.Someone had to supervise this operation.So I walked over...Climbed directly into her lap...Curled into a tiny ball...And began purring.The room went quiet.The volunteer blinked.The big human blinked.Even the little human froze.Then, very softly, she reached out one tiny hand and stroked my head."Gentle," the big human whispered.She was.Surprisingly.The little human looked at me with enormous eyes."Mar...Whoa."I tilted my head."Mar-Whoa!" she announced again, absolutely certain she'd gotten my name exactly right.Close enough.The volunteer smiled."He's been the calm one since the day he got here."I already knew that.The big human laughed."We weren't even here for a cat."Wait....What?She pointed toward a display near the front of the store."We came for a new collar for our dog."A...dog?Interesting.Not ideal.But manageable.I glanced back at the little human.She was now gently rubbing my forehead exactly the way I liked.Hmm.Acceptable.Then I looked at the big human.She had kind eyes.Tired eyes.The sort of eyes that looked like they carried the whole world around all day.Those eyes softened every time she looked at the little human.Then they landed on me.There it was.That tiny smile humans get when they don't realize they're already in trouble.Because by then...I'd already made my decision.This family clearly required professional supervision.The little human needed someone to keep her company.The big human needed someone to make her laugh.And apparently...there was a dog that needed to be evaluated.It was a lot of responsibility.Luckily...I was exactly the right cat for the job.JOURNAL ENTRY:Humans think they choose cats.That is adorable.They don't.We choose them.